Dan Pashman: Hey, everyone, we got another great Reheat for you this week. After rummaging around in the deep freezer, we've decided to thaw out our episode with Maria Bamford, one of my all time favorite comics and this is one of my all time favorite conversations. Maria published a memoir a few months ago called Sure I'll Join Your Cult, which she does with a lot of similar themes around mental illness that she and I talked about on the show. And remember, you can submit a request for a future Reheat. What classic Sporkful episode do you want me to pull out of the deep freezer and reheat to serve? Drop me a line. Let me know at hello@sporkful.com. Thanks and enjoy my conversation with Maria Bamford. 

Dan Pashman: Please note this episode deals with eating disorders 

[RESTAURANT AMBIANCE] 

Maria Bamford: I had surgery this past year, and I won't go into detail except the fact that they said it was okay for me to leave the hospital and suddenly the car seat was pooling with blood.

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: And ... [LAUGHS] And I was like, I think I ... I think we might want to go back. 

Dan Pashman: This is comedian Maria Bamford. We met up for lunch at Four Cafe in the Silverlake neighborhood of L.A. 

Maria Bamford: But before my husband drove me back, I said, "Can I please go to Fosters Freeze first?". Foster Freeze is a dirty Dairy Queen. 

Dan Pashman: So wait, you were literally bleeding. You're in the car bleeding. 

Maria Bamford: Oh yeah. Bleeding, yeah. 

Dan Pashman: And you said, "Let's stop for ice cream."

Maria Bamford: Yeah. Because ... Here's the thing. Because I had planned to have that treat post surgical procedure and then to go, 0h, just because they ...

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: I got to miss my treat?

Dan Pashman: Yeah. 

Maria Bamford: You know?

Dan Pashman: I know what you mean.

Maria Bamford: No. 

Dan Pashman: Like when you're looking forward [MARIA BAMFORD LAUGHS] eating something good and you're looking forward to it for days or all day — you're okay now, though?

Maria Bamford: Oh, totally. Fine. 

Dan Pashman: Good. 

Maria Bamford: Well, yeah, it was — I mean, I'm sure everyone has their funny medical stories where you're like, "It's an emergency room, right?"

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: I ... Is anybody have a drop cloth I can bleed on? I ... Okay, okay. No, I'll wait. I'll wait in this line, [LAUGHS] which I mean you have you have to wait because there are other emergencies.

Dan Pashman: I'll wait in this line with my ice cream. 

Maria Bamford: Mm-hmm. [LAUGHS]  

Dan Pashman: Maybe that's why they didn't believe you, Maria. 

Maria Bamford: Right. [LAUGHS] Yeah. 

Dan Pashman: If it was that much of an emergency ... [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: I know. That was just ... it did. 

Dan Pashman: Right, but maybe that was — you might have tipped your hand to the staff that it was not actually much of an emergency. [LAUGHS] 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: Today on The Sporkful, I sit down with one of my favorite comics in the world, Maria Bamford. In a lot of ways, I think eating an ice cream cone in a pool of blood is sort of the perfect metaphor for her unique, darkly funny comedy. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING] 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD]: My dad is very — he's a doctor, so he's very successful and, uh ... but he's obsessed with food. My mom has him on a heart healthy diet, so he's always telling me about his secret stashes with all the seriousness of a P.O.W. 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD]: Hey, kid. [GRUNTING] I got some powdered donuts. Yeah, they're in the freezer underneath all the vegetable crap ... Joe, what are you whispering about? You've got powdered sugar all over your face. ! Run kid! Run!

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

Dan Pashman: Maria also has her own issues with food. Coming up, she'll talk about what she calls her all-American eating disorder, and we'll analyze her salad eating technique to find out what it tells us about her battle with depression. Stick around. 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: This is The Sporkful. It's not for foodies, it's for eaters. I'm Dan Pashman. Each week on our show, we obsess about food to learn more about people. 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: Maria Bamford's comedy is just its own warped universe. Her ability to use her voice to conjure up different characters is legendary. In her comedy, she often portrays family and friends from her native Minnesota. She did one stand up special taped in her living room where the entire audience was her parents. And you might remember her Netflix show, Lady Dynamite, from a few years back. It was based loosely on her life. In one episode, she gets her big showbusiness break only to have a major breakdown. 

CLIP (PERSON): Maria, have you ever been diagnosed with any mental illness? 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): You say diagnosis, I say diag-yeses. 

MUSIC

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): I'm just trying to get some balance in my life. The only two friends I have left are Dagmar and Larissa.

CLIP (DAGMAR): You didn't even visit Maria in her time in need. 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): I'm sure you were very busy, Larissa. 

CLIP (LARISSA): I wasn't. 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): Okay. 

CLIP (LARISSA): I wasn't busy at all. 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: Maria has talked openly about her real life battles with mental illness. She's been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and has a lot of social anxiety. She says sometimes it's hard to get out of bed in the morning, which is why she often has a piece of chocolate for breakfast. It's a treat to look forward to, an incentive to start the day. After the sugar and a giant cup of coffee, Maria says she usually has an explosion of ideas, so food is fodder for her comedy, literally and figuratively. Let's hear a bit more of her standup. Then we'll go straight into my lunch with her. 

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDS] 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): Have you ever seen somebody order in this country? That's when you realize, hey, maybe we have too much freedom in the United States ... Can I just ask a quick question about the coffee? Is it organic? Okay, I don't want it. I don't want it. I'd like to have ...

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): I'd like to have a bowl of boiling hot water ... boiling, boiling ... with ice. And I don't want the ice to get all tiny. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND APPLAUDING]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): And then I'd like to have the turkey burger, but I want it sectioned into 14 quadrants. I know that's impossible, but do it. And then not on a plate. Not on a plate. Drop from an outside of ten feet piece by piece into my hands with an attitude of regret. Thank you so much. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND APPLAUDS]

Maria Bamford: Thank you so much.

Dan Pashman: Thank you. 

Maria Bamford: Thank you so much. Thank you. What I do is I pour salt on everything, even before I know what it tastes like ...

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: Because I know I'm going to want salt.

Dan Pashman: Right.

Maria Bamford: Hello. Here she is again.

Dan Pashman: Oh, here comes my tempeh Ruben. 

Maria Bamford: Tempeh Ruben. 

Dan Pashman: Tempeh Ruben. Thank you.  

Maria Bamford: Thank you so much. Beautiful. I think we're good.

Dan Pashman: Maybe just some napkins?

Maria Bamford: Oh yeah. 

Dan Pashman: Cause I'm going to get  — I can tell by looking at this that I'm going to get messy. 

Maria Bamford: It's kind of — a little bit messy. 

Dan Pashman: So let me ask you, Maria, when your — so your salad here has a lot of components. [Maria Bamford: Yeah.] You've got shredded wheat, shredded lettuce, sprouts, avocado, grilled [Maria Bamford: Yeah.] salmon, sunflower seeds, couple of kinds of greens. I see you mixing very thoroughly there.

Maria Bamford: Yes, yes. 

Dan Pashman: Is your goal with all these components in the mixing that you're doing now, are you trying to achieve a bite that compose — that gets everything in one bite? 

Maria Bamford: Everything — Here's what I do. Okay ... 

Dan Pashman: Talk me through it. 

Maria Bamford: Okay. [LAUGHS] I like to mix it all up, except for the protein. The protein, I wait until it sinks to the bottom. Last taste is the delicious protein that I have gotten — you know, that I've saved. 

Dan Pashman: So you'll eat the entire salad off the top and save the salmon for the end? 

Maria Bamford: For the end, yeah.

Dan Pashman: And what's the thinking behind that? 

Maria Bamford: Well, the thinking behind that is that I've done a good job. 

Dan Pashman: Right. 

[LAUGHING] 

Dan Pashman: You feel virtuous after eating all those greens. 

Maria Bamford: I did a really good job finishing the greens, and I deserve it? 

Dan Pashman: I see you sort of forking selectively. Have you ever put thought into the order in which you fork different areas of the salad so that you end up with something different on the tip of the fork and when you take a particular bite?

Maria Bamford: No. 

Dan Pashman: Well, let me try to sell you [Maria Bamford: Yeah. Mm-hmm?] on something here, Maria, because when you — whatever part of the salad is in the tip of the fork, that's the part that's going to land on your tongue. 

Maria Bamford: Okay. 

Dan Pashman: That flavor will be most accentuated. 

Maria Bamford: Okay!

Dan Pashman: So you should fork in ascending order of priority. 

Maria Bamford: Okay!

Dan Pashman: So whichever thing you want to taste the most of you want to finish with that, put that in the tip of the fork, and that way it lands and you'll taste that more. 

Maria Bamford: Well, here's the thing. 

Dan Pashman: Okay. [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: The whole — I just have to get these greens down.

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: It just — it doesn't matter how they taste. I just got to get them down. I'm delighted that they taste good, but I'm going to save all the avocado and the nuts, And the salmon for the bottom — again, sinks to the bottom. It's not unlike — have you had a Dairy Queen Peanut Buster parfait? 

Dan Pashman: I know them. I spent a lot of time with the Dairy Queen blizzard [Maria Bamford: Oh!] in my day, so I haven't been able to experience the full range of selections to that always.  

Maria Bamford: And I like a layered ... I do like a layered thing, like I layer cereal. You put ... 

Dan Pashman: Ohh, tell me about that.

Maria Bamford: You want to ... You put on oats and I'm going to say uncooked one minute oats, like those quick oats. 

Dan Pashman: Right.

Maria Bamford: But you don't cook them. Then you put, um, you know, like a Raisin Bran. Then you maybe put a light sprinkling of granola, nuts, raisins ... put on ... you know, drench it in skim milk — and it's a big bowl. You've made a big bowl of it. And it's just wonderful that, like search that you can go through each layer and ...

Dan Pashman: And do you eat — so do you eat one whole layer off the top or you go down to the bot — straight down and then get a combination? 

Maria Bamford: I get a combination. Combos. 

Dan Pashman: But you don't mix it. You get a combination but you ... 

Maria Bamford: I don't mix it. 

Dan Pashman: You like to keep the layers. 

Maria Bamford: No, no, no, no. Yeah, I like to keep layers. 

Dan Pashman: What do you think that says about you?

Maria Bamford: Ohh. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: That's I'm ... That I'm awesome.

Dan Pashman: Yeah. [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: I have really good ideas. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] This is a question that I've asked to several sort of deep thinkers over the years.

[LAUGHING]

Dan Pashman: At what point in a meal do you want to take the best bite? Do you take it first when your palate is primed and you're hungry? Do you save it for the end to end on a high note, or do you eat it somewhere in the middle? 

Maria Bamford: I'm going to say the end. 

Dan Pashman: Why? 

Maria Bamford: Because I feel like I need a reward for finishing ... finishing everything. I don't know why I see life is as a series of uncomfortable things and then rewards. But sometimes I do, you know? I mean, not that I ... I feel pretty good today, but sometimes I long for sleep. [LAUGHS]

Dan Pashman: RIight. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: You know? Which I don't know — I know other people aren't like that. Like they can't — they can't wait to get up in the morning. And maybe that's the ... the salad is all about depression. 

Dan Pashman: The piece of salmon is like the light at the end of the tunnel. 

Maria Bamford: Ohhh. 

[LAUGHING]

Maria Bamford: Yes. Yes, it. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): I have a — I never really thought of myself as depressed, as much as paralyzed by hope, and uh ...

[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): And I was seeing a thera-pist, the-rapist. I can't say it properly ... [SINGS] because I don't take it seriously! But I have a lot of anxiety. And my therapist, she told me to — why don't we sing those anxieties aloud? Let's take the power away from those little anxieties. Let's call those anxieties gremlins ... Why don't we just call them anxieties? ... Would you feel more comfortable with goblins ... Yes. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): So this is my anxiety song. [SINGS] If I keep the kitchen floor clean, no one will die. As long as I clench my fist that odd intervals then the darkness within me won't force me to do anything inappropriately violent or sexual at dinner parties ... woof. As long as I keep humming a tune, I won't turn gay. [HUMMING] It can't get if you're singing a song. Yeah. 

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDS] 

Maria Bamford: I remember one year I gained a lot of weight because I went to a violin camp and they had ice cream machines where you could just have the ice cream come out of the machine at you, and I used it.

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: And I remember I — I don't know if anyone said anything, but I think somebody must have said something because that was when I went on a diet for the first time. And I went on Richard Simmons, one of the first ones and then I lost, you know, whatever was. It was probably only like 7 pounds or something and the lunch lady at school was like, "You look great! What did you do over the summer?" [LAUGHS] I restricted my calorie intake.

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: And I squeezed my buttocks together so that I could feel like I was losing weight everywhere I went. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] But when she complimented you, [Maria Bamford: Yeah.] how did that make you feel? 

Maria Bamford: Oh, awesome. Just like, oh, I'm winning.

Dan Pashman: Right.

Maria Bamford: I am on meds that kind of I've gained weight on and I think I used to be more some may say just manic, but you were hypomanic. But I was also a lot thinner because I just had tons of energy and could eat anything. But yeah, and it could ... and kind of needed to exercise, like, one of those people who are just like, "I need to go out on a run because I feel it!". And now I don't ... I don't have that and there is some weird power to being thin or skinny. You know, where you feel like ... I'm super, you know? I don't know, at least that's what I felt that little — and now I'm just norm. 

Dan Pashman: But I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but you've also sort of like — there have been times where you sort of were a bit of a binge eater, is that right? 

Maria Bamford: Yes, yes. Oh, yes. I had a terrible eating disorder. Or not ... I mean, they were terrible and then I think I had an all-American eating disorder. From the age of about 10 to 19 I'm sub — there's lots of mental illness in my family, so it's I think it's a cornucopia of things that came together where I — and they did do studies that if you starve you will set yourself up to binge. But yeah, then I — what I did or one of my behaviors was, you know, not eat for a enormous amount of time and then, yeah, not be able to stop eating. And I did that up until I was 19. And then I called a suicide hotline and I got into a group, because I had to learn to eat, which is very — white privilege is speaking right now. I had to learn to eat ...

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS]

Maria Bamford: All sorts of different foods because I just wouldn't — I had so much avoidance of different stuff, so ... 

Dan Pashman: Is this a thing that traces back to your childhood? Like, were you always forced to, like, eat your vegetables first? 

Maria Bamford: My mom was always on a diet. And so there were some moral — foods were given good and evil ... [LAUGHING] characteristics and ... 

Dan Pashman: Right. 

Maria Bamford: Powdered donuts, evil.

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: Good ... What would she have Alba shakes? You remember those from the 1980s? 

Dan Pashman: Oh gosh. 

Maria Bamford: Oof. 

Dan Pashman: What was ... I don't ... Was that like the kale of the '80s? 

Maria Bamford: It's just so simple. You put it in a Cuisinart with some ice cubes and it's a foam. 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] It sounds delicious.

Maria Bamford: It's a chocolatey foam. 

Dan Pashman: I don't know why that didn't last. [LAUGHS] 

Dan Pashman: Coming up, Maria talks about the difference between going out to eat in her native Minnesota and going out to eat in L.A. And she'll tell us why she could handle waiting tables in one, but not the other. Stick around. 

MUSIC

 

+++BREAK+++

 

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: Welcome back a Sporkful Reheat. I'm Dan Pashman. Hey, if you're not already following The Sporkful in your podcasting app, what are you waiting for? In Apple podcasts and Spotify, go to our show page and click follow. In other apps, it might be a plus sign or a subscribe button or a heart. Whatever it is in your podcasting app, please do that thing. It's the best way to make ensure you'll never miss an episode and it's good for our show. So please, go ahead and do it right now while you're listening. Thank you. Now back this week's reheat. 

Dan Pashman: All right, Let's get back to Maria Bamford. Maria is the pride of Duluth, Minnesota, and her hometown often ends up in her act. 

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): You know, when you feel like maybe you've been a success in life and then you go back to your hometown, Duluth, Minnesota, and you meet your ... 

[AUDIENCE MEMBER CHEERS] 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): All right. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): And you go back to your hometown and you meet up with your archenemy, Christi Coombs, from high school at Target. And you realize nothing's changed at all and you're still the great Big Hos beast you always were. 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): So I saw you on TV or whatever. And it's just like in high school. It's like you're not funny. You're just weird. 

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS] 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): Comedy's subjective subjectivity is an art form ...So are you gay? Cause I heard a lot of one women comedians are gay ... No, I'm not gay. I mean, It'd be okay, if I was, but I'm not ... Well, that's good, because for me, I went to Christian Bible camp, you know, went skinny dipping that one night. And you wouldn't take your shirt off. And I'm like, 'Oh, my God, you got nothing to show anyway.' And then you took it off and we all gave you titty twisters. I was like, 'Oh, my God, if you're you would've been all turned on by that.' And then I just got all grossed out.

[AUDIENCE LAUGHS] 

CLIP (MARIA BAMFORD): Press debit or credit?

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING AND APPLAUDS] 

Maria Bamford: You know what I love about Minnesota? That may just be something from my childhood, but I think it still exists is an acceptance of whatever food is put in front of you. 

Maria Bamford: Oh, it's good. A wolf? We're fine. You know? Well, it seems big enough.

Dan Pashman: Right. [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: You know, like, it's just .... There's not, um. I don't remember seeing anyone send something back. [Dan Pashman: Right.] When I grew up. And I agree with that. I just think somebody spent time making that thing for you and, yeah, maybe out of a bag [DAN PASHMAN LAUGHS] or whatever ... but I remember I went to this painting class about five years ago in Duluth, and it was myself and a bunch of elderly ladies in big hats painting. And they just went nuts over the breakfast. They just said, " This is just so good." And it — what it was was like a banana and some yogurt and some Otis Spunkmeyer muffins, [Dan Pashman: Right. ] like the kind you get at the gas station? [DAN PASHMAN LAUGHS] And I was like, "What am I missing here?", and what I was missing was, uh ...  is that humble sense of gratitude that comes from being a child of God.

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: I don't know. Yeah, that ... 

Dan Pashman: But do you feel like when you go out to eat in Minnesota now, do you get, like, self-conscious that the people there are judging? Oh, Maria's in L.A. now ... 

Maria Bamford: Oh, well, I don't think anyone's thinking about me at all. But I think I definitely have different expectations. Like, I was in Milwaukee. I went to a coffee shop around 12:30, said, "Hey, can I have some coffee?" He said, "Oh, well, we haven't ... We would need to brew a new pot." [SIGHS] 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: Okay. Well, what ... Do you have a ... could I have a muffin while the pot ... Oh, no. We're out of muffins. Okay. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] 

Maria Bamford: It's just different. It's like the passion behind it is ... is like, well, you should have been here when there was a full pot of coffee. 

Dan Pashman: Right. But isn't it also — doesn't it also say something about the customers and the place? 

Maria Bamford: Mm-hmm. 

Dan Pashman: Because there are — you know, it's a certain kind of place and a certain kind of customers that are going to be like, "Oh, no problem. I'll wait ... [Maria Bamford: Yes!] till the coffee's ready. 

Maria Bamford:  Yeah, no worries. Yeah.  

Dan Pashman: You know? Right, I'm not in a rush. 

Maria Bamford: Yeah. 

Dan Pashman: No problem. 

Maria Bamford: And that was why I was able to waitress when I was in the Midwest. I was not a very good waitress. I have terrible social anxiety. I would get horrible nightmares the night before, every night. Like it never got better. And I was able to waitress in the Midwest because people would be like, "Well, she said she'd come back."

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHING] 

Maria Bamford: You know, she seems like she's under a lot of stress right now. And I mean, I think ... you know, I'll just go get a basket of chips for myself. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHING] 

Maria Bamford: I know where they are. [LAUGHS] Like, I worked at a Mexican restaurant and ... [LAUGHS] there were five tables sat down at once. And I could just barely keep it together. Like, I was just like, "Uh chips, chips in a basket, chips in a basket."

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] So, Maria, we've gotten to the end of your salad. 

Maria Bamford: Yes. Now, I have to say, um, the salmon was not as tender as I'd hoped. Sometimes — have you ever had salmon teriyaki? 

Dan Pashman: Yeah. 

Maria Bamford: So delightful. Not that this wasn't delicious, but I think I could have used — I think this is a very healthy salad, so it did not have cheese, croutons, a thick jalapeño ranch dressing. 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHS] Or the sugar.

Maria Bamford: Or the sugar. 

Dan Pashman: That's so integral to a good teriyaki sauce. 

Maria Bamford: I think ... 

Dan Pashman: Right. 

Maria Bamford: The sugar part, so ... 

Dan Pashman: So when that happens — you were saving the salmon for the end. 

Maria Bamford: Yes. 

Dan Pashman: And then it was a little disappointing. 

Maria Bamford: Yeah. Yeah. 

Dan Pashman: How does that make you feel? 

Maria Bamford: Well, there's another meal coming ... 

Dan Pashman: [LAUGHING]  

Maria Bamford: In just 4 to 5 hours. 

Dan Pashman: Right. 

Maria Bamford: I'll be able to have another meal. And what could that be? What will that meal be like? 

Dan Pashman: Have you sent any food back since you moved to L.A.?

Maria Bamford: Oh, God, have I? No. I know I haven't. I haven't. I'll ... I mean, I'll eat just about anything. Um, it's good. Um, I've have had a Caesar salad with too much dressing. 

Dan Pashman: Hmm. 

Maria Bamford: Where I've said, "Hey, come on, let's back off." 

Dan Pashman: Right. 

Maria Bamford: What are you ...  

Dan Pashman: And you can't fix that. 

Maria Bamford: Yeah, you really — you can't go back and I ... 

Dan Pashman: Unless you can ask for like a ... 

Maria Bamford: Another salad. 

Dan Pashman: Right, with no dressing. And then you mix the two to get the right ratio. But now you have twice as much salad as you need.

Maria Bamford: Salad. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that did — that has happened. I remember the sadness of getting a salad that was drenched in dressing and you know, at that point you just ... you just say, "Um, I'm not alone?" 

[LAUGHING]

MUSIC

Dan Pashman: That's comedian Maria Bamford. Check out her Netflix shows, Lady Dynamite and Old Baby, both of which are just perfectly bizarre and amazing. And Maria is touring all over the country this spring. I saw her over the winter in my town. She was as hilarious as ever. Find the dates at MariaBamford.com. 

Dan Pashman: Next week on the show. We revisit the topic of marijuana edibles. Yeah, I know, I said that was going to be this week, but we had to flip shows, okay? Working on any project involving weed takes time, as my guest in the episode will tell you. 

CLIP (GUEST): One of the things in this business is nothing happens that fast. 

CLIP (DAN PASHMAN): I wonder why?

CLIP (GUEST): Yeah. 

[LAUGHING] 

Dan Pashman: Please remember to get tickets for our next live show at Caveat in New York, it's in the Lower East Side. My guest will be caterer to the stars, Mary Giuliani, author of the new memoir Tiny Hot Dogs. That's Wednesday, May 8th. Tickets and info at Sporkful.com/live. 

Dan Pashman: Please follow me on Instagram @TheSporkful. I'm officially doing the stories on Instagram. I've really —  I'm very ... [LAUGHS] I'm very advanced on Instagram now. I don't put all that stuff on Facebook and Twitter, so we got to connect on Instagram. That's where the fun's happening, for real. Okay? Please follow me on Instagram @TheSporkful.